August WEP Challenge: Long Shadow

Image copyright Szilárd Szabó

The Notes
This piece ties in with my Urban Nightmare story. You can read that one by following this link: https://www.naughtynetherworldpress.com/2020/06/west-holpry-urban-nightmare.html

Content warning for profanity and snarkiness in case anyone is on a low saltiness diet.

This is Cthulhu Mythos/Lovecraft Mythos fiction. So, if that sort of thing really is not your bag, Baby, don't read it. 

On with the show!

From the long shadow of a dimension outside Euclidian space, a group of human spirits watched as a white-haired sorceress with skin the color of lightly tanned leather railed at the spectre of an imposing-looking man with silver hair, a slate-colored complexion, and impressive pointed ears. A dark-haired, angular man with Middle Eastern features sat on a throne, watching the proceedings in amusement.

“Idiot!” the sorceress snapped. “You destroyed your entire solar system with your clumsiness! You are the most incompetent excuse for a ruler that I have ever had the displeasure of dealing with. You are no monarch, Qweh. You are a goon combined with a jester posing as a king. Curse the day that your equally inept father succeeded in summoning my father and me. Damn this curse afflicting my weary soul!”

“I did not realize that you bore the burden of a curse, Madam Yadira,” the stately drow king interjected solicitously. “Perhaps I can assist you in breaking your curse to atone for my folly. Can you tell me the nature of said curse?”

“Moron! You could not assist me in sewing a serviceable quilt! The curse I speak of is in my very blood. I am a witch, but no ordinary witch. My mother is the lost Queen Nathicana, the benevolent sorceress who once presided o’er all of space and time. My father is that peerless commander of the cosmos seated upon yon throne—the mighty Nyarlathotep Himself, who, in His mercy, has spared you from my wrath. For my own part, I would have incinerated you to a single ash and ground the remains to dust beneath my boot. It is my immovable opinion that you are vermin and will only spread the plague of your ineptitude to any world you blight with your odious presence.”

Nyarlathotep held a jar containing sparkles of multicolored light. Although the lights were visually appealing, they exuded unsettling, malevolent energy. In the long shadow between dimensions, the spirit of a handsome, flamboyant bald black man grimaced and turned away, rubbing his temples.

“Henry, you all right, Mate?” a small Caucasian man with elfin features and shoulder-length hair the color of black coffee inquired.

“Bish, don’t worry about me,” Henry replied, his accent identifying him as being from the New Orleans area. “I just been sensin’ the motivations of that weird-ass, wrong-ass, wicked-ass Lite Brite for a few too many minutes. Those little fucks think they bad, but they just plain ugly to the core. I’ve known e coli that were more pleasant than that collection of ectoplasmic vomit.”

“Yah, they is a real can of worms,” said a tall, pale Scandinavian spectre with straight flaxen hair flowing to his mid-back. “They has no organization for their motivation, and they is stupid as mud. In the life where we knowed them, I thought them such colossal idiots that I wondered if one day they would forget to breathe. Their only desire is to lick Qweh’s arsehole, from which they think the sun and moon shines.”

“Right you are, Ketil, and Qweh ain’t the brilliant visionary they believe he is,” the small man agreed. “They think he’s a genius, but he’s just a big wanker. Bloody king of the wankers he is.”

“He’s a royal jerkoff,” Henry smirked.

“Yah, but you know who else is a jerkoff?” Ketil speculated. “Fucking Nyarlathotep and Yadira. They could stick Qweh into that jar with his fellow jerkoffs and let them make a daisy chain and jerk each other off for eternity and not make a bother for innocent souls again. But they shall release the entire fuckery, partly because of some bullshit about the cosmic order, but mostly because they are cunts.”

“We can discuss their cuntiness later,” Henry suggested, putting a hand on each of his companions’ shoulders. “For now, Babies, let’s hush and listen. We need to know what Yadira wants with Gerry, and we don’t want them to hear us.”

“How could they hear us, Henry?” Gerry inquired. “We’re between the bleedin’ dimensions. Anyway, Qweh has his head so far up his arse that when he farts, he thinks he’s hearing a brisk gust of wind blowing through the trees.”

“Boyfriend, I’m going to pretend you didn’t just say something so dense,” Henry sighed. “I couldn’t give a rare rat’s ass about Qweh. He isn’t paying attention to anything but the fact that Yadira Root, the witch who makes time her bitch and commands the cosmic forces like a five-star general is chewing his ass up one side and down the other, while her father, the big bad trickster god from beyond the stars, is holding Qweh’s moldy crew of sycophants hostage in a jar. I do not want Nyarlathotep or Yadira to become aware of our presence!”

“Yah, let us learn what we has comed here to learn,” Ketil agreed.

“You weren’t supposed to kill the thief,” Yadira railed at Qweh. “You were supposed to allow him to hone his skills under your sister’s tutelage. He possessed the dormant ability to form pathways in shadow and to mold shadow into living creation. I needed him alive!”

“A triad of pardons, Madam Yadira, but if you had but let me know that the thief must be spared…” Qweh started.

“I didn’t let you know because you would have telegraphed the fact that Serab was being groomed for a special purpose,” Yadira explained. “Once your sister realized the magnitude of his mission, she would have channeled her magic into awakening his dormant abilities and asked him to use his powers to spirit them away to who knows where.”

“Begging your pardon, Madam Yadira, but she did spirit him away…”

“Yes, she spirited him away in spirit after you murdered him, you dunce! Father, release this bungler’s useless companions and let them be on their way. At least we know that Qweh will lead us to Serab whenever and wherever he may reappear.”

“The actions of raving megalomaniacs are indeed predictable,” Nyarlathotep agreed.

1000 words

 


Acknowledgments

Nyarlathotep is the creation of H.P. Lovecraft, initially appearing in his 1920 story of the same name.

Nathicana is a character appearing in H.P. Lovecraft’s 1927 poem of the same name.

All other characters are the intellectual property of Team Netherworld Creations/Naughty Netherworld Press.

This piece was created from the August WEP prompt Long Shadow and the Reedsy Weekly Writing Contest prompt “write a story about a meeting of a secret society.”


Want More Ketil?


Find him in his very own debut adventure along with his extraterrestrial pal Yitzy Yithian and ghoul-friends Robin Roberts and Little John Tamboli. Can this quartet of misfits outfox Nyarlathotep before time runs out? The fate of the cosmos depends on them!

Buy the Kindle version for $3.99

Buy the PDF from LBRY for 75 LBC (approximately $2.25)

LBRY is a decentralized content marketplace. I price the PDF versions of my work at approximately half of the Kindle price because I receive the entire amount rather than a royalty percentage. 

You can get a free LBRY account through this link. You can earn LBC for viewing content on LBRY as well as from selling your content.

Copyright Information
The Icky, Sticky, Nit-Picky Legalese If You Please (Or Don't Please)

Copyright 2020 by Naughty Netherworld Press

Reblogging is acceptable on platforms that allow it. LBRY’s reblog function is called repost, which makes things confusing since reposting is considered a no-no on most platforms. It’s fine to share the post using the repost function on LBRY. It is not okay to copy-paste the material into a new post.

Sharing a link to the post is acceptable.

Quoting portions of the post for educational or review purposes is acceptable if proper credit is given.

This post was submitted to https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/ on 16 August 2020 for consideration in the weekly writing contest.

An early access version of this post was published on 17 August 2020 on these platforms:

The official post was published on 19 August 2020 at:

Get the Best from Naughty Netherworld Press
To find out how you can get more good stuff from Naughty Netherworld Press, follow this link.

37 comments:

  1. That was fun! Not a lot of redeeming qualities amongst the group but they make for a great story! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think one could count the number of nice things that could be said about Qweh on no hands. Nyarlathotep and Yadira both have their moments of kindness--when it serves their agenda! The trio hiding in the shadow are good guys with foul mouths.

      Delete
  2. Nasty and intriguing.
    I suspect I am going to have to read and reread several times to get fully across the myriad of stories/perspectives you have packed into this piece.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's the trouble with having a brain that works the way the Tenth Doctor described time. My stories are a big ball of wibbly wobbly timey wimey...stuff.

      Delete
  3. It is enjoyable but somehow not as glittery as its previous episode. That one shook me at every sentence. This one had less powerful spell on me. Yet, looking forward to the upcoming episode.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This bit has more of grunge than glitter to it. I think I would be inclined to agree that the last one was more viscerally powerful. This one is a bit puckish. Thanks for stopping by!

      Delete
  4. It seems that no matter when or where human-types come into contact there's conflict and lots of nasty business. You've nailed that human quality here.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you. The trio of fellows hiding in the shadow don't necessarily go looking for trouble, but it always finds them!

      Delete
  5. 'Content warning for profanity and snarkiness in case anyone is on a low saltiness diet.' Even the warning was hilarious! I felt mostly I was a fly on the wall in Trump's White House. Maybe I took it the wrong way, but I saw plenty of allegories. Fun! Trouble always finds them for sure!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It wasn't intentional as the Orange Buttplug wasn't in office at the time when I first created this story, but I've certainly seem more and more of him in Qweh since 2016. I certainly hope he ends up getting a good dressing down.

      Delete
  6. Humans...I tell you! The dialogue has come up really well. Not much light there but fun!
    -Sonia

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you. It's definitely a dark place within a dark place!

      Delete
  7. Hi,
    I find this story humorous. In fact I was cracking up as she was chewing out the dunce. And the conversation going on from the ones were observing flowed nicely and the funniness revealed through the eyes of what they saw.
    Great job. I enjoyed your submission.
    Shalom aleichem,
    Pat Garcia

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Pat. I tried to leave a comment on your piece (three times) but they either got eaten or are in your spam folder.

      Delete
  8. Why this felt like a commentary on this world's current affairs I don't know, but it did. And that Qweh reminded me of a particular living character too. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, it does to me too. I didn't notice until after I'd written it! I created these characters back in 2014, so at that point, Qweh wasn't anything but a villain in my Universe. He's taken on a lot more of Cheeto Twitler's attributes since 2016.

      Delete
  9. A grim but, amusing tale with several perspectives telling it. Well done.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Villains make fascinating characters sometimes. And what a bunch of villains we see here.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Two of them who have the power to command the forces of time and space, and one inept bumbler who destroyed his own solar system. Politics as usual!

      Delete
  11. This is a fun piece! This is a group of nasty characters I would never want to interact with myself, but they make for an entertaining read. And your content warning itself was entertaining!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I wouldn't want to interact with them either, but they are fun to write about. Thanks for visiting!

      Delete
  12. I like this Lovecraft-Netherworld mashup, very clever. This is funny on many levels. I like the content warning for just in case. Fun entry. Thanks for making me laugh. Hope to see more of it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you. I'm always delighted when someone enjoys my weird sense of humor. It doesn't happen that way often!

      Delete
  13. Well, this was fun! These characters aren't nice but they are interesting... and salty! As a Brit, I like the inclusion of wanker as a favourite epithet!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The three ghosts are nice enough, they're just foul-mouthed. The other three, however, are best avoided. Thanks for reading!

      Delete
  14. Very entertaining, Cara, Ornery Owl. Got a bit lost in the characters, though the dialogues were funny and incisive. Moron Henry = trump ? No offense to any Republicans out there ....
    Happy WEP week.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Henry is coming to haunt you for taking his good name in vain! He's the ghost of a blues musician who committed suicide following several tragedies.
      Qweh is an equivalent of tRump, although that wasn't the way he was created. I started writing this series back in 2014. Qweh was always a cruel, inept megalomaniac and the tRump equivalency has started to bleed in more and more. I don't mind. He's a character I love to hate, unlike Agent Orange, whom I straight-up hate.
      I don't mind insulting Republicans, unless they start to see that electing dictators is doing no-one any favors. I don't like living in a banana republic.

      Delete
  15. Now that was an enjoyable read. The insults being bandied around warmed my heart and gave me a huge burst of energy. Great piece. I went back and re-read your last WEP offering and was delighted a-fresh.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much! I think you just made my day. :-)

      Delete
  16. Fun ! I could hear her yelling at him. D. Jarchow

    ReplyDelete
  17. Thank you for the warning, being a bit of prude I was aware when I was reading it and 'skipped' those words I don't particularly like. I think this is a story/theme that you can continue to expand on with all the themes coming up.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You must have skipped half the story. ;-)
      I've been working on this particular series since 2014, but it's only this year that I've started letting it out of its cage.

      Delete
  18. You've let something good out of its cage! I'm not into Cthulhu, mainly because I can't type it, but this was good writing. Have fun with the rest of your world!

    ReplyDelete
  19. Yes - I too am glad I know something of what to expect ... but bullies are too much ... but you have a fun way of exploring their rather unpleasant long shadows - I hope they get their cumuppance. Take care - Hilary

    ReplyDelete
  20. I hate it when mommy and daddy fight... Just kidding!
    This was some good times reading these characters arguing with each other. Some real hijinks there.

    ReplyDelete

Weekend Writing Warriors 20 September 2020

http://wewriwa.blogspot.com http://www.facebook.com/groups/snippetsunday The Notes Last time, Robin annoyed Ketil with his spe...