Idiots in my Comments

I know you will be surprised to learn that I sent these comments to Spam, but I thought they might give you all a laugh.

It’s not that I’m horny all the time. Hey, i am looking for an online sex partner ;) Click on my boobs if you are interested (. )( .) 
Unknown
on 7/25/20

Tease me until I’m begging for it Hey, i am looking for an online sex partner ;) Click on my boobs if you are interested (. )( .) 
Unknown
on 7/22/20

I’m in my bed, you’re in yours. One of us is obviously in the wrong place. Hey, i am looking for an online sexual partner ;) Click on my boobs if you are interested (. )( .)Saturday: 2020-06-13

Toys in the Attic: Alone: A Modern Fictional Haibun

Alone: A Modern Fictional Haibun

Sabella took her art bag and a cushion and walked into the thicket to the east of Dark Lake. There was a picnic area a little over a mile away. She felt guilty for being relieved that the grounds would, more likely than not, be empty. Thanks to the Trump Virus, tourism was next to non-existent this year.

The thicket was shadowy and smelled of pine and loam. The gloom embraced Sabella like a pair of comforting arms, and she let her darkest thoughts surface. At sixty years old and in less than perfect health, she might not have a lot of time left. She was fat, she was diabetic, she was on medication for high blood pressure, and she had a mitral valve prolapse. She refused to have the valve replaced because she didn’t want to be on blood thinners for the rest of her life.

Sabella knew that she was everything that the youth-oriented culture created by advertising disdained. When her hair started going gray at thirty, she had let it go its way. When the first thing out of a doctor’s mouth was “we need to do something about your weight,” she was quick to fire back that she realized that her size made her a pariah in a culture that embraced nearly skeletal thinness, so the doctor was welcome to think that she was ugly as she had no control over other people’s thoughts, but she wasn’t here for yet another starvation diet.

“Let’s get the labs and see how well my thyroid medication isn’t working because it never really does,” Sabella would tell the doctor. “Let’s see if I behaved myself well enough during the last three months that my A1C is in the single digits. Let’s see if the blood pressure medication is working the way it ought to, which it usually does. Thankfully, the nurse took the reading before you had a chance to piss me off. You’ll find that the EKG looks about the same as it ever does. I’m here about diabetes, hypertension, hypothyroidism, and my mitral valve prolapse, Doc. I couldn’t give a gnat’s fart in a category five hurricane about trying to lose enough weight to squeeze myself into skinny jeans. I prefer to wear my fat pants and be comfortable, thank you very much.”

Sabella hoped that the doctor in Newport would be savvy enough to realize that this tough old bird wasn’t going to change and would prefer to address her conditions rather than her size. She’d run out of patience long ago with the sort of physician who wanted a perfect patient and believed that shame was an appropriate approach for anyone who didn’t measure up to his or her standards.
“Perfect patients would put these idiots out of business,” Sabella speculated with a wicked smirk. “Perfect patients don’t have any need for doctors.”

Sabella emerged into a clearing of lush summer grass and was pleasantly surprised to see that park services still trimmed the area around the picnic table. She sat down with the sun to her back, sending out a wish that she would be allowed to remain alone while she wrote or drew. She didn’t want to feel the touch of anything but the breeze. She wanted to forget her awful argument with Alex, but, as always, the memory of their heated words pushed its way to the forefront of her mind.

A tear flowed down Sabella’s cheek, and she brushed it away angrily. A brusque bite in a blustery draft burst through the soft, summer zephyr, and Sabella noticed dark clouds on the horizon.

“Fine, I’ll make it quick,” she sighed. “Here I am, rushed as always. I thought I moved here to relax, Uriel. Are you ever going to get around to telling me why you wanted me to move here?”

Not hearing a discernible reply from the angel, a directionless Sabella put pen to paper. Her messy cursive painted a heartfelt Senryu for her younger sibling.

 you are my brother
why must our bond be broken
sorrow in my blood

Acknowledgments

This fictional Haibun was created using the words cursive, touch, and forget as directed by the Tuesday Writing Prompt Challenge from Go Dog Go CafĂ© https://godoggocafe.com/2020/07/28/16154/ and the Baransu challenge from Carpe Diem Haiku. https://chevrefeuillescarpediem.blogspot.com/2020/07/carpe-diem-exploring-beauty-of-haiku_20.html  

The image is copyright gayleenfroese2 on Pixabay. https://pixabay.com/photos/crow-picnic-table-mountains-park-5405099/

Copyright Information

The Icky, Sticky, Nit-Picky Legalese If You Please (Or Don't Please)

Copyright 2020 by Naughty Netherworld Press
Reblogging is acceptable on platforms that allow it. LBRY’s reblog function is called repost, which makes things confusing since reposting is considered a no-no on most platforms. It’s fine to share the post using the repost function on LBRY. It is not okay to copy-paste the material into a new post.
Sharing a link to the post is acceptable.
Quoting portions of the post for educational or review purposes is acceptable if proper credit is given.
This work was published on 28 July 2020 on these platforms:


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Charity Sunday 26 July 2020: The Sean Costello Memorial Fund for Bipolar Research



Charity Sunday is a meme designed to give authors and bloggers a chance to give back to the world—as well as, hopefully, attract new readers. 

How does it work? Each participant selects a favorite charity. Before Charity Sunday, you should prepare a blog post that: 
1) talks about the charity and why you support it; 
2) provides a link to the charity; 
3) includes an excerpt from one of your books; 
4) includes the code to show links to other participating blogs.

It’s fun if you can make the excerpt relate somehow to your chosen charity, but this isn’t required.

For every comment left on your post, you commit to giving some amount to the relevant charity. The specific charity and the amount to donate are up to you. You can set an upper limit to your donation if you want.

Right out of the starting gate I'm gonna be breakin' the law--breakin' the law! Folks, I only made about $5500 last year, and right now, my Paypal is tapped. But I still want people to know about this lesser-known charity, the Sean Costello Memorial Fund for Bipolar Research.


Sean Costello was a blues musician. He died of an accidental overdose one day before his thirtieth birthday, 15 April 2008. Sean's mother started the foundation to raise awareness about bipolar disorder, a condition that remains misunderstood in many ways.

My excerpt comes from one of my current WIPs, "Toys in the Attic." You can purchase the entire chapter on LBRY for 15 LBC. An LBC is a form of cryptocurrency which is currently worth approximately $0.03.


“To sleep—perchance to dream. But I’m doing no sleeping, so there will be no dreaming,” Sabella Laaksonen sighed.

Sabella’s insomnia was the reason that she had usually worked night shifts. Now that she was no longer a slave to a time clock, she was trying to go to bed at a more sensible hour. Midnight would do, but as the clock struck one, she realized that it would be another sleepless night.

Sabella sat before the computer that she had set up in front of her couch. She had been living in the old house beside Dark Lake for a week now and had only managed to spend two nights in her bed, never hitting the sheets before three a.m.

“I was hoping to get serious about working on my novel now that I don’t have to go to a job anymore,” Sabella opined. “Uriel, you said you wanted me to write it. I don’t mean to complain, but a little inspiration would be appreciated.”

Visit the other Charity Sunday Participants

The Icky, Sticky, Nit-Picky Legalese If You Please (Or Don't Please)

Copyright 2020 by Naughty Netherworld Press

Reblogging is acceptable on platforms that allow it. LBRY’s reblog function is called repost, which makes things confusing since reposting is considered a no-no on most platforms. It’s fine to share the post using the repost function on LBRY. It is not okay to copy-paste the material into a new post.

Sharing a link to the post is acceptable.

Quoting portions of the post for educational or review purposes is acceptable if proper credit is given.

This chapter was published on 26 July 2020 on these platforms:

Get the Best from Naughty Netherworld Press

To find out how you can get more good stuff from Naughty Netherworld Press, follow this link.

Thirsty Thursday: If I Could Drink, I Would

Image copyright Darkworks on Pixabay

If I could drink, I'd be blotto right now. But since I can't, I'll share this depressing bit of lit for Thirsty Thursday.

Twelve-year-old Sabella Laaksonen looked up into the star-filled sky as she stood by the rental cabin beside Dark Lake in Eagle, Vermont on the last night of summer vacation, and made a wish.

“Star light, star bright, first star I see tonight. I wish I may, I wish I might have the wish I wish tonight. I wish I had a friend who I could tell my secrets to—a friend who would understand and like me for who I am, not who they think I could be if I just tried harder.”

Sabella had been raised to believe that if you are kind, others will be kind to you, but she found that others are only kind if they think you’re pretty, and nobody thought that Sabella was pretty.


These paragraphs are from my WIP, Toys in the Attic. If you like that crap, you can head over to LBRY and buy the whole chapter (approximately 3000 words) for 15 LBC (approximately $0.30.)

If you don't have a LBRY account, sign up for one here. LBRY is a decentralized marketplace where you can share your work, set your own prices, and keep everything you earn.


That's all for this Thirsty Thursday. Feel free to share your links in the comments and I'll try to check them out and share them next time I do a Thirsty Thursday.

~Cie for Naughty Netherworld Press~


Click this link for more ways to get your Naughty Netherworld Press Fix

Weekend Writing Warriors 19 July 2020: Ornery Poetry Archive: Rain




I wish it would rain
Gloomy day with gray haze
Like the not quite sorrow in my brain

The sky won't cry
Neither will I
Guess neither of us have it in us to try

I have too much
But not enough
Too much trouble
Not enough of the right stuff

I wish it would rain
Wash away my weariness for just a while
I wish the sky would cry
So I wouldn't have to.

~Cie~

Written for the unfortunately now-defunct Alpha-be Thursday

Jenny Matlock

And Now the Notes:

I'm combining Weekend Writing Warriors and Ornery Poetry Sunday. I've uploaded both of my poetry compilations in PDF format to the Poetry of the Netherworld Channel on LBRY. These compilations are also available in Kindle format, but the PDF versions cost approximately half what the Kindle versions do. Visit the Poetry of the Netherworld channel here.


I highly recommend getting a LBRY account as an alternate venue for sharing your work. LBRY is a decentralized marketplace where you can set your own price and keep all your earnings. An LBC is a form of cryptocurrency. It was worth about $0.02 at the time of this writing.

https://lbry.tv/$/invite/@naughtynetherworldpress:d

For more information about where you can find and consume Ornery Poetry, visit this link.


This poem was written on 21 March 2013. Later in 2013, I regretted writing it because the area I was living in was hit by a flood. My car was hit by a wave of water coming across the road in an area that was normally a field. I struggled with PTSD for some time after that incident, feeling that I didn't deserve to write because people had died and I was still alive. 

I may be dredging poems out of the archive for a while. My life is still quite a chaotic mess from dealing with cleaning out my old mobile home where I lived for 18 years with severe depression and very little in the way of assistance or compassion from others. I was able to make myself go to work and take my son to school, but not much else. The end results are catastrophic. But life is better now even if it is still stressful, and we would like to get on with the poem, wouldn't we? Let's do that.

~Cie the Ornery Old Poet, In Case You Didn't Know It~



The Icky, Sticky, Nit-Picky Legalese If You Please (Or Don't Please)

Copyright 2013 by Cara Hartley

Reblogging is acceptable on platforms that allow it. LBRY’s reblog function is called repost, which makes things confusing since reposting is considered a no-no on most platforms. It’s fine to share the post using the repost function on LBRY. It is not okay to copy-paste the material into a new post.

Sharing a link to the post is acceptable.

Quoting portions of the post for educational or review purposes is acceptable if proper credit is given.

A paid version of this poem was published on 17 July 2020 on these platforms:





The free version of this poem appeared on 18 July 2020 at

http://www.naughtynetherworldpress.com

http://poetryofthenetherworld.blogspot.com

and on 19 July 2020 at

http://fishypoets.blogspot.com

Weekend Writing Warriors + Shameless Self-Promotion Saturday 4 July 2020

Image copyright Maklay62 on Pixabay



I'm hoping to get back on track with my snippets from Ketil and Yitzy's Adventure in the Xura Dream House. The last snippet I shared from this novelette can be found here:

 http://www.naughtynetherworldpress.com/2020/03/weekend-writing-warriors-22-march-2020.html

“’Ang on a tick, Johnny!” the small ghoul advised in a nasally alto voice somewhat reminiscent of a creaking hinge as he lifted his finger to his sharp-toothed mouth. “Is that him?”

“Him whom?” the first ghoul inquired as his companion pulled him towards a clump of spiky bushes.

“Ketil Nagel, that’s whom! Where have you been?”


“Undead since 1918, like you! Why should we give a toss if that’s Ketil Nagel? I’ve no strife and snarl with him.”

~Cie for Naughty Netherworld Press~


Buy the Kindle version of Ketil and Yitzy's Adventure in the Xura Dream House for $3.99  https://amzn.to/2ZHmryK

Buy the PDF version from LBRY for 75 LBC (approximately $2.25)




Ornery Owl
Free Use Image Copyright Open Clipart Vectors on Pixabay

Ornery Notes
I was intending to publish The Ballad of Gerry Clifford today but instead decided to spend the month going over it one chapter at a time to make sure it is really up to snuff. I read each chapter aloud after doing my two initial editing passes. 

I am working on the first draft of Toys in the Attic for Camp NaNoWriMo. I like Camp NaNoWriMo because you set your own goals rather than having to write 50,000 words in a month on one project like the regular NaNoWriMo. I probably do write 50,000 words a month, but it is spread out over multiple projects.

Whenever I have done NaNoWriMo in the past, I have ended up with a steaming pile of rubbish that I can't bear to look at again. The only thing that has even a vague chance of passing muster with this process is smut. I don't enjoy it, so I don't do it anymore. It only took me about thirteen years to figure out that I really cannot write anything worth reading using the NaNoWriMo process. I'm kind of slow on the uptake sometimes.

I broke up with Publish0x and am now re-opening the Horror Harridans Writing Sisterhood as a catch-all blog, for whatever that's worth.

Happy Independence Day to whoever celebrates such. I will probably have the recipes for the Divine Dijon Drumsticks and Dijon Garden Potato Salad up on the Good Stuff From Grover Blog tomorrow if anyone is interested in those.


Keep on keeping on, and if you have a project you'd like to shamelessly self-promote, feel free to leave a link in the comments.

The Icky, Sticky, Nit-Picky Legalese if You Please (or don't please)


Content copyright 2020 by Naughty Netherworld Press

Reblogging is acceptable on platforms that allow it. LBRY’s reblog function is called repost, which makes things confusing since reposting is considered a no-no on most platforms. It’s fine to share the post using the repost function on LBRY. It is not okay to copy-paste the material into a new post.

Sharing a link to the post is acceptable.

Quoting portions of the post for educational or review purposes is acceptable if proper credit is given.

Here are the places where you can support Naughty Netherworld Press. 
We keep it real and affordable.

Insecure Writers' Support Group + WTF Wednesday 1 July 2020: A Sincere Apology

I'm sorry. Here's a Chihuahua


The Insecure Writers' Support Group question for July is:

There have been many industry changes in the last decade, so what are some changes you would like to see happen in the next decade?

What a fantastic segue! Fair warning, I cuss a lot. If you are bothered by profanity, you will want to give me a miss. 

Self-publishing has started to be taken seriously during the past decade. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately for the quality of the material being presented) most self-published authors are not independently wealthy, so we need to engage in self-promotion as well.

I would like to see myself become independently wealthy in the next decade.

That being said...

My longtime followers have probably not failed to notice my promotion of a platform called Publish0x over the past several months. I was a big fan of Publish0x. The platform allows readers to tip authors using cryptocurrency from the Publish0x pool at no cost to themselves. That sounds pretty damn great, and it probably would be if the people who run the platform weren't prats.

Obviously, the bloom is off the rose.

"So, Ornery, what happened? Why did you give Publish0x' ring back?"

I logged into Publish0x to do my thing. Lo and behold, the write a post function is gone. A glitch? Nay. It turns out that my Naughty Netherworld Press blog was removed without warning because Publish0x claims that I seriously violated one of their terms. 

I don't know which one, because they sent me a crappy form letter, which said:

Hello,

We're sorry to inform you that your authorship privileges have been removed. This is due to a serious breach of our rules when posting content on the site.

If you wish to dispute this decision then please respond to this email, stating clearly why you believe your authorship should be reinstated.

Thanks,
Publish0x

Well, exactly what do you want me to do with that overwhelming lack of information, Publish0x? I don't know which post violated your rules. Other than embedded Twitter videos featuring cute animals that lead back to the source, the only content I publish is MY OWN. I cite my sources and use free pictures from places like Pixabay. 

The last post I published on Publish0x was this one:


The content of that post was original. I cite where I cross-posted it. The material being sourced was written by me. That post is me all over.

Initially, this is what I wrote to Publish0x support.

I am not sure why this has happened. I only publish material that I have written and correctly source any material such as videos and images. I only use free-use images from Pixabay and such. I have posted some embedded videos from Twitter, but these clearly link back to the source. I have always been very careful not to break the rules and would like to know which post you are referring to.

Eleven minutes later, this is the tune I was singing:

Never mind, just delete my account. If you can't even be bothered to tell me which post was the problem or what I supposedly did that was a breach of conduct, that is pretty unprofessional. I have always been very careful to follow your rules. Other than the occasional embedded twitter post with a cute animal video, which links directly back to its source, all the material I post is my own work. I correctly identify my sources, and I only use images from free-use sites such as Pixabay. 

This form letter is the height of impersonal. I liked your platform and thought it was an excellent alternative to WordPress and Blogger. I promoted the platform every time I shared a post. Unfortunately, I will be rescinding my support of your platform and I would like you to delete my account immediately. In fact, I will be suggesting that people not use Publish0x.

So, there you have it, Folks. I am going back to the tried and true. Publish0x was a pain in the ass anyway, but I thought it had potential. 

The Owl Has Spoken


Ornery Owl
Free Use Image by Open Clipart Vectors on Pixabay

The Icky, Sticky, Nit-Picky Legalese if You Please (Or Don't Please)


Content copyright 2020 by Naughty Netherworld Press

Reblogging is acceptable on platforms that allow it. LBRY’s reblog function is called repost, which makes things confusing since reposting is considered a no-no on most platforms. It’s fine to share the post using the repost function on LBRY. It is not okay to copy-paste the material into a new post.

Sharing a link to the post is acceptable.

Quoting portions of the post for educational or review purposes is acceptable if proper credit is given.

Here are the places where you can support Naughty Netherworld Press. 
We keep it real and affordable.

Robin's Heaven: Weekend Writing Warriors 25 October 2020

http://wewriwa.blogspot.com http://www.facebook.com/groups/snippetsunday The Blurb The fate of the Cosmos rests in the hands of a...